hinge – Young n' Anxious

Dearest Men of the World,

I am writing you this letter out of love, not anger or annoyance. I sincerely hope you take this message with grace and a desire to change rather than a need to rebel, as my intent is to only aid in your future romantic endeavors, no matter what your desired outcome might be. I have recently noticed a serious decrease in the overall quality of your Tinder profile pictures. I am only partially talking about those of you whose pictures are too blurry to decipher or just lack proper photograph proportions in general (in those cases, I would be more than happy to provide you who live in NYC with a principles of photography class for 100 dollars an hour.)

In an effort to help you, I am going to start off by listing some of the very best type of tinder profile pictures and then highlight some of the very worst. Please take note. I am happy to officiate any wedding that these profile changes might lead to. Just give me a little bit to get ordained online.

Dearest Friend and Reader,

As I sit on the train, headed all the way to the opposite side of the
city on a train bound for midtown, I must reflect on the boys lost and
those of the future.

Simply put, as I sat on my L train emerging into civilization from the
deep, dark middle of nowhere depths of Ridgewood, Queens, I can not
help but open my handy dandy free dating apps and begin to swipe. As I
swish and swish my finger back and forth through the meaningless
pictures of idiotic boys who do unbelievably idiotic things like write
“man” as their profession, I stumble upon the ONE. Unfortunately, at
this point in my life, I had run out of likes, yet I can still promise
with the utmost sincerity and absoluteness that this man is the man
for me.

Here are the criteria that make be POSITIVE that darling TJ is such a
perfect match. In no particular order:

Young n' Anxious

I have never been in love, but I talk about it anyway.

Tag: hinge

Guide to Tinder Profile Photos

I think I’ve found my soul mate and now im buying Hinge: A Saga in the Form of a Letter